I've been watching a lot of "Sex in the City" episodes lately...you can get complete seasons on DVD from Netflix. I love that show because it explores relationships and all the complicated feelings and emotions that are involved. And I'm here, just like Carrie and her column, writing my little blog about the same kind of stuff, although unlike Carrie and her friends, there isn't much sex going on... (Side note about "Sex In the City": How is it that Samantha has this endless string of hunky sexual encounters, when I find it hard to even find anyone that I'm attracted to? Maybe the fact that it's TV show has something to do with it. If only my life could be casted with hunky actors that were hot for me...but now I'm digressing into fantasy-land. Back to reality)

In "Meet my Level 5 Boyfriend", http://home.earthlink.net/~yvettefrancino/singleagainonlinediary/id6.html
I write about a "Commitment Leveling Tool" which has come in quite handy when talking about relationships (one of my favorite topics!) I may make it required reading for any potential dates.

The tool has these levels:
Level 1. Flirt and hope for a positive reaction
Level 2. First date
Level 3. Kissing and progressively more
Level 4. Decide you want to date exclusively
Level 5. Sex!!!
Level 6. Introduce your friends, families, and kids
Level 7. Say 'I Love You'
Level 8. Go on vacation together
Level 9. Talk about a future together
Level 10. Get married.

Each person has their own unique commitment ladder, but these are the levels I identified when I was going out with Fart-Boy. At the time, as I discuss in that article, I was concerned about not getting past Level 5. Now that I'm back in the world of dating, I'm concerned that I'll never get to Level 5 again! Pre-Level-5 is just as confusing as Post-Level-5.

Oh...I've happily found some Level 1 opportunities. My big problem is as you start climbing that commitment ladder, you take a bigger and bigger risk that you're going to fall off of it and get hurt. Unless you make it to the very top and get married, you will at some point either fall or voluntarily step off that ladder and it's painful. Level 5 is probably the riskiest step on the ladder...Before that, falling off isn't too bad...you can get up and walk away without breaking anything. But, for me, Level 5 is a big step without a safety rail. Falling off the ladder post-Level-5 is almost certain to cause a lot of heartache. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever be brave enough for the Level 5 step again.

What about Level 3? Now that's confusing, too, and deserves it's own blog entry. Stay tuned for the next episode of "No Sex in the Suburbs".

Blog Cheater

I admit it...I have another blog. It's over on http://home.earthlink.net/~yvettefrancino/singleagainonlinediary/index.html
and it's about dating again in your 40's after you've been through a divorce. I started out as a virgin blogger over there. But then something happened....my friends started reading it! Yes...I guess that can happen when you give the URL to your friends. In particular, the guys I am dating are reading my blog, so I am not very free to write exactly what I want. Why do people write blogs anyway? Diary's are supposed to be private and you write a little differently when people are reading it...at least people you KNOW!

So, I thought I'd come over here and write where no one will know me. I can't help but feel like I'm cheating on my other blog. Just like with dating, I have this overly-honest need to confess all. My other blog probably doesn't care that it's not an exclusive blog relationship...but, but, but what if my readers find out? Do I need to tell them that I have "another blog"?

Actually, I'm just a little curious about all this blog stuff and wanted to check out the features of blogger. My other blog doesn't allow for feedback on each posting. So, I'll do a little comparison shopping and then probably choose one or the other. The deceit of writing in two blogs is just too much for my guilty conscience.